It is a very long story but my husband discovering several new kinks and his bisexuality are all wrapped up together in the online emotional affair he had. Now he still looks at the porn he was sharing and looking at and talking about with the AP. His affair had a few spin off shows, all revolving around these kinks. Now he still consumes a ton of that porn. I am really struggling with it. It’s liked not only is there the usual insecurity some women feel around their partner and porn, but it’s also that the content is just… triggering to me now, I guess? Before all this I couldn’t have cared any less if he watched porn or not. I hate that how it makes me feel so anxious and insecure, but it doesn’t feel right to police somebody’s porn consumption. No amount of saying “if you start watching this porn again I’m going to leave” would convince he isn’t just hiding it anyways. So there isn’t much point in even suggesting he stop. But I really don’t think I can stomach knowing he’s still spending all that time seeking it out and looking at it and following the creators on twitter for much longer. It’s really fucking me up.

How have you handled porn in your post infidelity relationship?