My girl and I have been together for over 3 years now. The past year I have grown deeply depressed due to not being able to find a job, not seeing my children (from a previous relationship), and falling behind in child support payments. Rewind a little bit to just before thanksgiving of this year. I was really depressed at that time and was contemplating suicide, but I had a great meeting with my pastor and it changed my mind. My girl and I went to run some errands, which included going by a friends house for some farm fresh eggs. While my girl ran in to get the eggs, she left her phone in the car. She has never given me a reason to look in her phone at all. It was unlocked and sitting on the passenger seat. I didn’t touch it, but I did glance at it. When I did, I noticed some guys name I hadn’t seen or heard before and also noticed that the notifications for him were silenced (it was on messenger). It was at that point I did go thru the messages. I didn’t have to scroll far to realize it wasn’t just a normal conversation. I didn’t want to read too much because I wanted to give her the benefit to explain herself. It also hurt too much when I saw they exchanged pics. When I confronted her about it, she claimed they were just friends and just talking and it was only going on for a couple of weeks. By what I read it was more than a couple of weeks and was more than just messaging. She told me it was my fault because I was depressed and suicidal and she felt like she couldn’t talk to me. She wouldn’t show me any of the messages and she quickly deleted them. I also know that this isn’t the first time other men have messaged her. I don’t have social media so I don’t see what she’s putting out there. I fear that it hasn’t stopped and I’m being led on. She wants to stay together but I can’t look at her without thinking about who she’s messaging. My heart hurts so bad and the suicidal thoughts are coming back. Please help…