I have no idea what sub is appropriate for this question, so if there’s another that may be more helpful I don’t know about I’d appreciate any help. I’m mainly seeking insight from anyone who has been in the military or knows about the process.I’m a 17 year old woman and my boyfriend is 18, and we’ve been together for 4 years.

Recently, he has been talking about wanting to enlist and has talked to a recruiter. He has been diagnosed with OSDD, PTSD, PTSD-induced psychosis, and depression. He was hospitalized for a s*icide attempt in 2020. He has hallucinations daily as well as constant personality shifts per the OSDD, and it is not controlled by medication.

He has a history of abuse, perpetrated by a man. This has left him with an extreme discomfort around other men, and he’s barely even able to sleep in the same room as me, let alone another man. He gets extremely confrontational if someone he doesn’t know touches him unexpectedly.

He is insistent on enlisting. I tried to tell him that I’m very worried and that I think it would be miserable for him. My brother and my brother in law are in the army and marines respectively, and I asked them questions about his conditions and triggers without naming him, and they agreed there was no way he’d be let in. I tried to tell him this, and he got furious at me, saying I’m being selfish and I just don’t want him to do it so I don’t have to be lonely. (He knows I have severe abandonment issues as a result of BPD).

He says that he can “control” the hallucinations and switches, and that they don’t “bother him that much” anymore. Apparently he specifically told the recruiter about his illnesses and she said it was possible to get a waiver.

I’m just at a loss. I hope this long post made sense, and again if there is a sub I could get more specific advice on please let me know.