This may sound like a rant but I just needed to get this off my chest whilst asking for advice on this situation. So sometime last year I met this guy let’s call him Adam. Adam (30) and I (23) seem to have a lot in common when it comes to values and want we want for ourselves in the future which finally felt great to have after so many years of trying to find this exact feeling of just peace and understanding. Months pass and I’m starting to have feelings, I express this to him because it’s just how I am. When I feel something I tell them. He said he felt the same but he wasn’t ready to take things to the next level, I said okay and went about my days. Time passed and we still were in this weird limbo where it feels like nothing is changing anytime soon so again I asked him where is this going because I don’t want to feel like I’m wasting my time. He expressed how he wanted to be with me but he had “demons” that he needed to work on because of his last relationship, she did cause a lot of damage with his insecurity and trust 😩. During this time my mental health rapidly declined, I didn’t feel wanted by him at all it just felt like I was his fwb or something since it was the only time we seem to be having fun and laughing. I explained to him my exact feelings and how I didn’t think it was fair to string him along I wanted to focus on my mental health and be happy with myself. During this time he seemed to understand why I was stepping back from what could’ve been but didn’t. During the time we spent apart (a month and a half or so) he would beg for me to give him another chance to show me how I should be treated and loved so I did. This lasted maybe 2 weeks because he decided to blow my phone up with long paragraphs asking where I am, or why I’m not texting back, him accusing me of being with other people. It was overwhelming waking up to all those messages it was even a bit of a turn off. It reminded me of my ex and I didn’t like that feeling. I told him I wasn’t going to continue communicating with him but he pressed and pressed about me giving him yet another chance. I didn’t believe in giving people multiple chances because I should’ve been appreciated the first time around. I’ve also noticed when it comes to serious conversations he likes to say a joke or something which kind of annoys me because it makes me feel like my feelings are invalid. Idk when I look back on everything I just see a lot of red flags, I don’t know why I’m still here. If I stop communication I’d have to change my number because I know he wouldn’t respect my decision that I don’t want to be with him. I love him I do I just don’t like the way he makes me feel I’m sorry for the rant there’s more but that would’ve been too much to write