So my(25 m) partner(23 m) and I met online through mutual friends and clicked really well, we chatted and lead to flirting then started dating after a few months. A few months later after consistent face time calls at night and lots of struggling we got to meet in person and hit it off even more, we chatted about moving me out to his country because my home life was so bad. I visited a few more times and eventually got accepted in to school out there. I got accepted and wait listed and we moved me to this new place I had fallen in love with ( it's a really great place and I enjoy it a lot even outside our relationship) we've been living together for roughly 6 months and dating for a year as of a few days ago.

Afew weeks ago he brought up the idea of us getting seperate places once our lease was up as we can't afford this place while I'm waiting for citizenship and unemployed. It took a while and I warmed up to it and agreed it was a good idea as I miss having my own space.

We had a talk the other night about our sexual dry spell as it's been resulting in him having panic attacks lately ( we aren't abusive or anything by any extent) we talked it out and I thought things were good as we had sorta resolved things or atleast talked about a game plan. That was on the 2nd now it's the 7th and it's two days after our year anniversary and he's talking about opening our relationship to meet other people and try out polyamory. I've had a few poly relationships in the past and he knows none had worked out and ended quite badly. I told him I think we should wait a bit to talk about that more as it's a lot and a lot of things are going on. We had a whole cry session and both are kind of stuck on what to do. I'm spending the night at a friend's house to help her get to an appointment in the morning. He's now messaging me saying we should take a break from dating and try something more casual for a bit. We agreed on me couch surfing at our friends house for a week. I asked him what a break entails for him and he responded with "A break to me means we sort of just Stop hanging out for a bit, start dating a little more casually just to take like a Break from each other I feel like we’ve become codependent. So boundaries rules basically We’d go on dates, but also maybe have a chance to see other people for a bit. We’d still talk regularly and it wouldn’t be a cutting off just like A literal little break"

I gave my two cents that I think a break is an okay idea but I'm not comfortable with dating other people just yet and he told me he wants to rush in to it because he wants to save us from more issues down the road."

I suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder and try my best to cope with it from things I've learned in therapy. Sometimes dealing with ideation is just a bit harder than normal. All of this has really made it harder than ever. When he went to work I relapsed and self harmed then went to my friend's place.

I'm at a loss of what to do at this point moving forward. Any help would be appreciated.