Just before the pandemic really started last year I (M34) found out my gf (F34) of just over 5 years had cheated on me. But what surprised me was that I wasn't upset about the cheating but the lying. I had always thought of myself as monogamous but this had me questioning that and wondering if I am more open to an open style relationship. We went to therapy for a while but stopped when lock downs started. I had thought that it was done with and that she wouldn't cheat again. About a month ago I was snooping where I shouldn't have been and discovered condoms. We don't use them, which means she has or is going to cheat again. But again, I'm not mad about the cheating and would actually welcome her having satisfaction with someone else, if it means the same for me. But since I found them by means of a way I shouldn't have I don't know how to broach the subject again with her. Or if I even want to truly rock the boat. I just don't know where to go from here. I love her and want to be with her but I think I want more, something open where we both don't have to worry about sneaking around and still have each other.