So any one my age (late 20 early 30s) maybe a couple voice or video chat with me. I need both sides. I'm trying to do the right thing but honestly my therapy don't srartbupnfor another week and a half. I just want some insight on where I went wrong. I'm trying to stay home and keep distracted. Build Legos or something but I just need a kind voice to help me understand where I haven't found a reason to things. I know slot of it is me but it can't all be me right. I'll end up going down the street and drinking at the bar and talk to random strangers. And I'm sure that's not healthy. Im really struggling with this. And staring at my phone waiting for something that isn't going to happen will drive me crazy I can't do another night of it. Indunno just throwing it out there. Maybe burn some tree together while we talk. I'll gladly give my number for FaceTime or some thing. Probably won't reply after a while but thank you for anyone who understands and reached out. Reddit has been my lifeline while I'm still on hard mode with life.