Somewhat long story made somewhat short, girlfriend and I do not live together and she is about 40 minutes away working as an ER nurse in a major hospital. She does not work in a COVID-specific unit but she has had contact with COVID patients through the normal course of her job duties. She has neither been tested nor is symptomatic. She was used to working five days per week, now has been reduced down to three, and has stated that she is lonely and struggling. Her roommate is also a nurse at a different hospital.

We have not seen each other in person for approximately five weeks. We have maintained close connection otherwise through the usual Facetime and calls, texts, etc. I have been the driving force behind our distance for both state-issued stay at home except for essential travel and the fact that I have an underlying auto-immune disease (MS). My job lets me work from home.

We've been together for 5 years, most of which involved her being a travel nurse all over the country, so going a stretch of time without actual contact has not been abnormal. The last few days/week or so have been incredibly stressful and difficult as she believes our relationship is no longer meeting her needs and she is extrapolating out the current situation to me not accepting her career or indicating that I will always be gunshy about being around her, given health risks that are inherent with a nurse. I think that comparing a once in a generation pandemic that is fatal to people in my category is short sighted and selfish.

I am well aware that being a nurse in these kinds of times can take a heavy toll on someone's mental health and stress, but I also have a hard time taking risk assesment from someone who makes almost daily trips to Wal Mart, Target, etc. because she believes that stay at home orders are not needed for "just a virus".

I feel like I have a decision point that comes down to my health or my relationship. If I'm overreacting, I'll happily yield and I do hope I am.

EDIT: turns out she was actually texting and talking to an ex for the last few days. So apparently the whole “I need more” story was simply a proxy argument for the real issue of her not wanting to be in a relationship with me. But thanks for the advise everyone.