Short backstory: I grew up in a very positive religious home (honestly just a very warm loving family who had the best intentions) and I didn't really date/have sex until turning 27. Fast forward a couple of years and I gained some experience (10 short term partners, 2 that lasted a few months). Thus, I don't feel like I've had the traditional maturing stages of "date in HS, sex in college, a few girlfriends along the way". Moreover, I really got used to be happy just being alone and doing things solo (or with a few close friends).

Present day: I'm dating a very kind girl who likes all my nerdy quirks. Usually dating is tough for me because girls don't seem to like these quirks, but we had a great time right off the bat. Normally, I'm so focused on getting another date that I usually don't really considered what would happen if a girl wanted to have a relationship with me. In this case, she brought it up while we were both really drunk and I said "well we might as well since I'm not seeing anyone else".

So once the relationship began, it felt like something in me changed. While sounding cold-hearted, it kind of felt like I had just won a video game or read a book. Now that I had gotten her to like me, the challenge was over and I didn't feel so good about it. She was all excited that we were now going out (she apparently found herself usually rejecting guys) and she made things really go too fast for me. I met her brother right away and her parents a week later when they were in town. All nice people, but I always thought those things should come once you really know a person well (like months down the line).

My previous (and only other) "girlfriend" really got upset when I didn't do things like bring her flowers or say "I love you", so this time I decided to avoid any possible screaming/tears by going along with the flow. While I always figured my emotions could catch up and I could avoid any friction along the way, I'm still waiting to feel something "extra special".

It's been 4 months since we became "official" and she is so head over heels excited, that I feel guilty that I'm not at her level. Not that I don't think I could feel those things too, I just really don't feel them yet. On top of that, she's feeling more comfortable with me and now she answers honestly when I ask her how things are going (sadly the answer is "terrible day" everyday and "you're my only bright spot")

So a few things: 1) Is it common for someone in the early stages of a relationship to be way more committed than the other? 2) Does loving someone really make you feel giddy when you're out of hormone raging teen/early-20s age? (a few friends have said they don't really feel the way they did 10 years ago about love anymore) 3) Does this sound like a healthy relationship or something that's like a slow moving train wreck? Are there any tell-tale signs I seem to be missing?

I'm sorry for the long post. Thanks in advance to anyone who takes the time to read and answer any of my questions! So grateful!