A close friend of mine (F30) has been with her husband (M33) for a long time, they have children together. He has recently left the home and this is something he has done a handleful of times over the years. He doesn't appear to have much of a window of tolerance or great coping mechanisms so runs when things get to much.

My friend is always supportive of him from what I can see during these phases, understanding of his mental health and tries her best to support his healing. He however appears to be very dismissive towards her and comes in hot and cold, says he will return, then says he won't, then says he doesn't know until he ultimately returns. He promises therapy but does not appear to commit long term.

She is an incredible woman and deserves to be loved by someone who has their shit together basically. I am trying my best to be supportive of her and have offered all the help I can. I am worried she is stuck in an abusive marriage with a narcissist. I have expressed my concerns and she is aware of how awful he treats her during these periods but justifies it to his "poor mental health".

I am fully aware that divorce especially with children in the mix is not something to take lightly so I understand why she stays, but I am lost on what else I can do. I want to punch this man in throat. He is taking advantage of an incredible person and I hope she works up the courage to leave him for good.