So I’ve had an issue with my coworker at my job for the longest time. We used to hang out but of a sudden she messaged me saying she doesn’t want to hang outside of work anymore and I was like whatever. I was romantically interested in a bit but she had just gotten out of a five year relationship and in the end I didn’t feel attracted to that way and only saw them as a friend.

I invited her over for Christmas dinner with my family as she didn’t really have any family in my part of my country. She was in a long distance relationship and was attending school but her former boyfriend decided he didn’t want to move out to the same city as her. I only invited her over platonically and again, I only held a tiny bit of romantic interest at the time. I only really saw her as a friend. We hung out five times outside of work, watching movies together and nothing of a romantic nature happened. However, I said something about not wanting to see a certain type of film, as it can be very triggering for me and my anxiety. She told me she wasn’t interested in watching movies with someone who didn’t

I also just have slightly different tastes in movies. After the last time we hung out, I asked her three more times to hang out. It wasn’t constant but once a week. And that’s when she messaged me saying like hey I’m not interested in hanging outside of work anymore. I politely said that’s totally ok and asked if I had done anything wrong. She left on read. Fast forward a week, she comes into work with another guy so I assumed she got a boyfriend. I was fine with it and it didn’t really bother me. However, I was more upset with not getting a reason for why she didn’t want to hang outside of work, even though I got my answer. I just didn’t get like official confirmation. Also being dumped as a friend hurt.

However, fast forward again a few months, I’m dealing with my mom having breast cancer and my grandma passed away recently. We just start talking less and less and to the point where she ignores me and doesn’t say anything to me. She also blocked me on Facebook so I was left feeling more confused. Our conversations at work were civil and didn’t go beyond talking about cats, before she blocked me. I never messaged her again after she said she didn’t want to hang outside of work again and left her alone. wanted to ask her why but I didn’t just have the emotional energy given dealing with my mom at the time. This went on for a few months and I just let it kinda let it fester.

So, last night I decided I had enough and I just went up and asked her:

“Like, hey we haven’t talked for a long time, have I done anything to offend you?”

And she said

“I would rather keep it that way. I don’t want to talk about personal things or life things with you, only work stuff.”

And I left it at that. I’m just really confused and she ignores me all the time. She acted like I murdered someone yesterday or that I’m a bitter ex. I wasn’t sure she ever showed signs that she liked me, but I think she did. What can I do?

I wanted to let go of this and get an answer as I had a shit year and this was the last thing remaining that felt left open to me. I also wanted to try and extend an olive branch to restart over again.

Edit: Now after talked to her last night, I’m just leaving it alone. I tried and I’m not doing anything else