My ex is my son’s father, I left him a couple years ago as the relationship was very broken, we were together 10 years. I discovered something he kept financial info from me, and when I confronted him he got angry and gaslit me and stonewalled me, slam doors in my face and it was the straw that broke the camels back. I said I don’t love him and we are done.

Fast forward two years later, an expired no contact order against him for attempting to take our child away, a new relationship that I’m very happy in, his harassment ultimately ending in him cutting off all contact from the world, living in his car on the side of the road somewhere and spiralling into depression/sabotage.

I’m finding this time of year I’m really struggling with feelings of guilt and sadness for him. I don’t feel guilty for leaving per se, I know it was right for me. But I feel guilty for being so happy, for having this wonderful new relationship, successful career, a new surprise baby on the way, and a full heart while he sits in his car on the side of the road somewhere with nothing or no one.

He COULD connect with his parents, he was living there and seeing our son for awhile every other weekend. But they set boundaries he didn’t like (be nice to them, better himself), and he also feels they betray him for talking to my mom and me about him (which we never wanted, and set boundaries about).

I’m sad that he’s alone, I’m sad that he’s choosing to live like this, that he can’t better himself and be there for our son. I’m sad that he’s so angry, broken, lost, miserable, hateful. I try not to think about it. But it sucks. What am I suppose to do? He blames me for everything wrong and thinks I ruined his life.