Throw away account for obvious reasons.... Just for a little background: (also not going into too much detail because it's very complicated).... I'm 20 (turning 21) and have been on reddit since I was 18. During my freshman year of college, I started joining groups with men over 30. I'm not sure why, but l've always been attracted to older guys. It's just something about their demeanor and how they carry themselves (for the most part lol).. Anyways, fast forward to October 2023.. I met this guy via reddit and we hit it off. Ofc he was older but he was a gentleman and wasn't pressuring me into any weird convos. We messaged constantly on reddit for almost 3 weeks before he initiated a meet up. We ended up meeting at target parking lot and sat in his truck talking for hours. After our first encounter, we met regularly for lunch, activities etc. I noticed that he had tattoos of what seemed to be kids' names. I soon found out that he had 2 kids and a wife which whom he was separated from but still living under the same roof og It really didn't bother me at first because he's just been such a nice guy this entire time. We do lots of romantic things together, he caresses my body exactly how I want and he has exposed me to more mature activities that I really enjoy lol... with him ofc. Unfortunately lately, I have been feeling a bit of guilt due to the fact that i went through his phone one night and seen messages of him and his wife. She expressed how she missed him being home and how the kids have been wondering where dad is and why he's barely ever around (his kids are older, not babies but younger than me). I came across these messages about two months ago now and I don't know how to bring it to his attention. I feel like he'd be pissed knowing I went through his phone. On the other hand I feel like a s|*t wrecking a home. I also just want to add that I am attending undergrad in a very large city. I live off campus and he lives about 35 minutes a' from me. Whenever we meet up, we get hotels or airk for a few days or more depending on his schedule. I have no idea what he is telling his wife when I'm not around. I honestly just feel bad.

I guess I just need some advice on how to move forward. Is my bf a terrible person because he wasn't truthful with me about his relationship with his wife? Should I end the relationship and move forward with my life? No one in my family knows I'm literally dating a guy old enough to be my dad so I just don't have anybody else to vent to.

*Also typed this in my notes before brining it to reddit. Don’t judge please 😭😭