My bf 22M accused me 22F of cheating. So he was over and my phone rang and a male coworker was calling me at 1am. I can’t lie I did panic because my phone’s been on DND for weeks now since work has been busy so I was surprised when my phone was ringing. He thought I was hiding something and asked me why I was being secretive. I can’t lie, it did look bad in the moment but I promise I didn’t cheat.

He didn’t really talk to me the rest of the night and fell asleep and didn’t want to talk to me in the morning even though I was trying to explain myself. I honestly kind of laughed when he was serious about thinking I cheated cuz it was ridiculous. I’ve talked about cheating with him in the past and he knows my very very strong opinion on it and I’m always really scared of getting cheated on so I would never do that to anyone. We haven’t talked in over a week and I feel like he’s gonna breakup with me and I don’t really know what to do. Our relationship was genuinely going really well the past few months and we haven’t had an argument in months, so this whole situation is throwing me off guard and I’m kind of in shock right now.

Also to add, I definitely blame myself for not telling him about this coworker in the past when we were talking about friends of the opposite sex. I tend to differentiate friends from coworkers so I don’t see coworkers as friends which is why it was never brought up. Also, this guy coworker wasn’t in the country when I started seeing my bf, so it didn’t really cross my mind. I’ve been working with him since 2019 and he went to Europe to pursue his masters in 2023 and we kept in touch and it was always platonic.

I haven’t told many people about it but when I told my one friend, she kind of thought it was ridiculous just because she knew who my coworker was and she knew it has always been nothing but platonic.

I’m even grossed out about the accusation because I’m the kind of person who’s against with coworkers hooking up and dating and I’ve talked to my bf about that in the past so I thought he would know that by now, but I completely understand how he feels because I would feel that way too.

But I wouldn’t ghost someone for over a week. I’ve tried to ask to talk in person but I’ve gotten no reply. I am dealing with it better than I thought. Haven’t really broke down and I’m not sure if it’s because I’m completely innocent but even if I am innocent I thought I would cry because I’m sad he’s not talking to me.

He’s definitely more of an avoidant attachment and I’m an anxious attachment and usually I give him space for a day and we talk it out the day after but it’s been a little too long in my opinion.

I wish he knew me how I knew myself and how the people around me knows me because everyone knows I wouldn’t do such a thing. But I also had a past and slept around before I met him, so that probably throws him off a little and makes him think I would cheat. But when I’m in a relationship, I’m in a relationship. I don’t fuck around because it takes a lot for me to commit because I don’t want to get hurt. I’ve always been the one who got heartbroken in the past which is why it’s scary getting into a relationship for me. I’m definitely a lover girl and will always be.

Let me know what you think because I don’t know what to do except continue to live my life and get through the day hoping he'll finally believe me one day.

How long is too long to wait? I know I should have some more self respect, but I can't let go of this relationship for such a dumb reason after going through months of happiness.

Edit - I texted my coworker at 12, don’t even remember why and honestly thought it was earlier than that but he was busy atm and called me when he wasn’t to see what I wanted. I completely forgot I even texted him til I looked at our chat a few days later. We’ve always been closer for years now and to add, I definitely have been trying to distance myself from him the past few months because I would kind of be uncomfortable if my bf was tight with a girl like that. But my coworker did not get the hint at all. And now I’ve completely cut him off because I feel so uncomfortable talking to him now even tho he technically didn’t really do anything wrong.