Here is the story. I was setup with a guy by a mutual friend (through an older lady who I volunteer with at a religious organization). She had been trying to setup us up for what feels like almost a year. I am 37, and he is a 56 year old divorced dad with three kids (divorced for a year and half but taking a lot time which feels like a red flag and he's still paying her mortgage??). It seemed like a lot but I was open to just meeting, and I asked her to position it as just "friends" which felt more natural and less presure for me. She emailed us both, and he took the intiaitive and planned a drinks at a restaurant that I love. When we met right away he was very eager and interested and it felt overwhelming. he drilled me on many different quetions, including my age and family and everything. I actually thought he was pretty cute and more attractive than I was expecting he was very tall and strong whcih I love. He paid for dinner and was SUCH a kind gentleman walking me around to get a free parking pass walking me all the way to my car, just beyond kind and so sweet opneing all the doors, and just very curteous. I did enjoy his company but felt a little overhwlemd by how strong he came on, like mentioning having a kid but him being older. But i did like him. I also felt though that he wasn't fully emotonally over his divorce. he said somthing like their finances are still somehwat combined and his ex-wife looks at his credit card bill which creeped me out, even though it does seem to clearly be over. After the date I could tell he was definitley interested and wanted to kiss me but I was nervous and got in my car and went home. I did text him thank yuo and that i had fun.

I didn't hear from him for a few days, and I texted him something like "let me know if you want to make a plan to meetup again" - and he responded right away and said yes that would be great. he eventually made a plan, although he didn't do a great job and it took me following up again saying "did you want to make a plan" again he responded yes right away and said want to do a walk tomorrow. I said yes but i wasn't excited about a walk especially with one days notice. it rained so we ended up getting Mexican last Monday night for dinner. It was nice and again he was super sweet and i love his manners. I do think he might be too old fo rme. This is when I felt like maybe things got weird - I get nervous on dates and when i'm nervous i become a bad listender and end up talking about myself non-stop. I have a lot of issues with my parents (I hate them and they're very rich and use money to control me, etc.) and I kept going into so many details about that and the issues with them and how they call me fat (i'm not) but just sigh its so embarssing, why did I do that and kept talking about them, and I didn't do a great job of asking him questions :( After dinnner he walked me to my car again and lingered but didn't kiss me but I was also kind of looking away and was nervous, and wasn't sure what I wanted becuase I dont know why all of a sudden I felt scared. But he was kind and texted me and checked on my dog, and then on election night we texted a little bit but barely. Then I texted him the next week asking about his daughters birthday, but I just couldn't tell if he liked me anymore or was interested. I had also mentioned in a text on election night "I was going to see if you wanted to come over and keep me company bc i'm nervous but I ended up going to my friend Jenna's houe" and he kind of glossed over and didn't respond to that comment, which made me think he didn't like me.

Then two weeks go by and I get kind of annoyed, and I say something in a text like "I like you and have fun with you but I can't tell how intereted you are in me, and I think I need more from you - more talking, more hanging out, etc. otherwise we should just be more platnic friends" and he just responded "Lets just be platonic friends". I do wish and think it would have been polite if he had said a few nice things like "I liked you too and had fun with you too but...." anyway - I have no idea what came over me, but then i responded to him "I just don't think we're on the same page, all I really want right now is somebody to have fun with and good sex with" (to which he never replied and so now I guess its' over.

It's all kind of sad and awkward becuase in the end that really is what I want somebody not overly serious who I enjoy who just wants to have fun and have good sex and who is attracted to me I am an attractive girl, and I do think he found me attractive, but I guess he didn't want to date me? I don't know I'm hurt and feel sad, even though I'm not actually sure how much I liked him (and dont like the idea of having to deal with a man who has kids does not seem fun), but I just feel really hurt and rejected. Can somebody please help or advise? I need to learn I'm worthy and loveable and a man doesn't determine my value. And I need to let the issues with my parents go and know that a man will love and adore me despite not coming from loving parents (although they are rich and I unfortunately talked about that too). I'm just sad - please help and advise. Why can't he just be sweeter to me and adore me and have fun with me and great sex but not make it too serious?? Help :( Am I too awkard? Did I ruin it? What is my lesson? :(

What i reallly wish is that we could hang out and have fun togheter and enjoys each other's company but not have it be like so serious. I think the fact that he has kids makes it feel so serious right off the bat because we have to talk about them and that feels heavy. I just want him to cuddle with me and have fun with me and adore me and have fun without it being a whole big thing ugh.