Hello, as the title states, when ever I try to start a relationship, things go great for roughly two weeks until the other person just falls off.

I dont really know if its a me thing or the other people thing, but its really starting to take a toll on me as I always feel like someone's third choice, and that Im often just being kept around as an option to settle for, rather than a direct choice. I've been in "two" relationships before, both were ended by me simply because I didnt feel like we were a good match (first one he lived abt an hour and a half away and was extremely generous with money and idk just rubbed me the wrong way, second one we both mutrally agreed to end things and just remain friends as a relationship prob wouldnt work out from us).

However, Ive been using the apps like Tinder/Hinge to meet people and like, while things begin great, we talk back and forth, quick replies & actual conversation, after about two weeks it eventually just kinda dies? I dont know if its something I do to cause this, or if i keep going after unavaliable people, but its starting to kinda hit me that I havent really ever been someone's first choice when it comes to dating.

Example One: Joe and I met on Grindr, however we both agreed we were kindve looking for something more than just a one night thing. So we add each other on snap and honestly its going really well. We keep talking & eventually decide to grab coffee together. The coffee went shockingly well, and I asked him for his number as, for me social media is where I send people to be forgotten about, I dont really use it or like it as a way to talk to others. We keep talking for a few more days, and honestly things seemed fine, we were still getting to know each other, made loose plans to meet again sometime the randomly he just stopped replying to texts and completely ghosted me. I asked a mutral and she refused to comment on the situation and honestly it has just left me confused. I sent an apology text & a I wont contact him again text and it was left there. However I was never told if it was something on my end or his, however based on the mutral's response I guess it was something I did at some point.

Example Two: Brendan and I met on Hinge. We start talking and I quickly realize that he is putting in a lot more effort than the previous people I had spoken to off of Hinge. We talk on there for a few days and things go great, so we move over to Insta to just get off Hinge & so we can send each other pics & see each other's lives a bit better. Overall its going really well. I had tickets to a concert through my work that I had forgotten about, and remembered the day before, and offered him the tickets, we went and had a great time spending almost 6h together. I also did ask for his number before we parted ways because I was really feeling him. We continue chatting and plan to meet again in a few days, which we do. We walked the mall, grabbed some fast food & painted some ceramics in a local store. Honestly the entire thing went super well in my opinion, and I was excited for the third time we can both find time to meet up again, as I was quite into him. However directly after his response times fell off, conversation fell off, and he fell off (Again around the 2 week point.) and I am just thoroughly confused as to why this keeps happening.

Ive made it clear to the people Ive met off the apps that I dont want to rush things and that Im just going with the flow at the moment, and everyone Ive spoken to has agreed with me on that front. I havent gotten down on one knee and asked these people to marry me, or even call me their partner. The farthest Ive gone is with Brendan, I asked him if he was talking to anyone else (after about two weeks) just to see where/what he felt, and he said he was kindve talking to some other people. I phrased it as I was asking nothing more than the question, as I wanted to make sure we were on similar pages of kinda how we felt about each other however after that he fell off.

I dont necessarily see an issue with a question like that however I feel like that is part of the issue as to why people quit responding to me over time. For me, I just ask as I dont really want to "waste time" with someone who isnt really interested in me. I know two weeks can be kinda fast to ask a question like that, however that was the only time ive asked someome that and that was because I was seriously feeling him.

Overall I dont know, it could be that Im chasing up the wrong trees and going after the wrong kind of people, or that I am seriously fucking shit up in some way and not realizing it. I have no clue if I explained everything right, if yalls have any questions please ask below and I will try to respond, Id just like some advice on how to quit fumbling the bag every chance Im given.