I have been in a long distance relationship since last June. It’s been really painful. My fiancé and I have been together since 2022 and he had to go back to South Korea to renew his student visa. Long story short he got denied and we tried two times after that while he still got denied. Our immigration lawyer suggested we processed with the K1 fiancé visa. We found out last night he got denied and it was an 8 month process just for this to happen. Really I don’t know why he got denied maybe because of the student visa denials?

My mom was always very vocally that she didn’t want me to move to South Korea. Since I met my fiancé in 2022 that was her biggest fear with our relationship. She always told me she doesn’t want me to move there and be apart from her. I have been to South Korea 3 times and I love every moment that I’m there. It’s such a beautiful special place! For a side note my fiancé comes from a very well established family so they always assured me finances won’t be a concern. But from the times of me mentioning to her that I wonder if I should ever live or spend time there. My mom would have full on meltdowns and start sobbing. She would cry with the idea of me leaving and that would put me in such an awkward position.

Since my fiancés visa got denied I’m thinking of moving to South Korea. I can pick up a job as an English teacher since it’s so high in demand there. We have a plan in place of what to do incase this has to happen. We still might apply for a marriage visa but at this point I feel like moving there might make more sense since I don’t have a visa record.

I told my parents what happened and they are understandingly upset. My mom said she understands if I have to move there but I can tell it breaks her heart. After talking about it in deeper conversation she started sobbing that she’ll never see me again and see her future grandchildren. I assured her I’ll always be back in the U.S. and she told me it’s not the same.

I feel so guilty that because of me my mom is so depressed. I don’t know what to do at this point. I don’t know if it’s best to just stay here for my family can be happy and I don’t ruin anything? Or is it time to put myself first and do what makes me happy? I can’t imagine a life without him but I’m scared of hurting my family.