Lately, I've noticed that my girlfriend and I have been growing apart. When I asked her about it, she admitted that she feels like she doesn't really know me. She said that I tend to change depending on her moods and that I never seem to disagree, take the lead, or communicate when something she does bothers me.

I understand what she means; I've been so afraid of risking our relationship and causing problems that I've let her take control of everything, avoiding stepping out of my comfort zone while letting resentment build inside me. This pattern has repeated in all my relationships and ended more than a few.

I want to know how to make a permanent change and I've started therapy. Should I start disagreeing on small matters? Should I express opinions I know aren't entirely rational? How can I make my own thoughts and feelings important to me again?

Even if we don't work out, I need to improve for myself and future relationships.