I [28F] am currently struggling with my boyfriend [31M] gaming addiction. Before I write anything else, I want to say I am a gamer myself. I know times, especially after a release of a game, that one will be completely hooked and very much into one game. Usually I have no issues with people spending a lot of their free time online, but recently I started to feel neglected by the amount of it.

Starting with my current situation. There’s been an update to one of his favorite games. It started approximately two weeks ago. His day consists of being on discord, with his friends playing the game. He works shifts, so it is either before or after work, he stays up a lot, rather playing the game than getting a good amount of sleep. I only work morning till afternoon, so when we do have an evening together, he rather plays his game, instead of watching a movie or cuddling with me. I voiced my feelings before, telling him that I miss him and I need more time with him. He bought the game for me, saying that we can play it together and i’ve tried it but since he’s talking to his friends online, it really just feels like a passive together time. When I voiced my feelings once again, he kinda just brushed it off. On top of that I am currently struggling mentally. I don’t feel too well because of workload and the little free time I actually have under the week. But even after letting him know, he didn’t really stop for one evening. It is not like I want him to stop entirely, just maybe for one day so we can do something together. I feel misunderstood and he makes me feel like my wishes are unfair. On top of that I am really jealous, because one of his discord friends is a girl, and she gets to spend more time with him, than I do and it is making me furious. So now I constantly feel aggravated and bad about myself. Our sex life has decreased ever since. He promised me last week, that the amount of time he spends will decrease this week, till the 10th of September, because then there will be an event in the game so until then he will play less but it has not happened yet and he still rather plays his game. I want to understand if i am actually being unfair or if my feeling are valid, and if so how do I approach the situation. Given that I don’t feel good at all atm, I fear I might not be able to accurately voice my feelings. I need help, maybe one of you has been in a similar situation before. If it keeps going, i fear I might start holding a grudge against him, because I can already feel that sadness turns into anger and I don’t want to lose my relationship over it. Should I insist and be more upfront or should I leave him be? I am conflicted on what to do next.

TL:DR: bf plays game, and spends more time with his online friends (one being a female) and I feel neglected and misunderstood, for wishing he would spend just one evening with me. I need advice on how to handle the situation. Should Just for your interest, we’ve been together for one year now, and before gaming has never been a problem