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I (27F) am upset with my fiancé (29M) for having me go to Japan with his parents?
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anonymoususer2468- is in Japan
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My fiancé and I had to do long distance for a bit due to us doing the K1 fiancé visa. We have been apart for a while but luckily he’s been approved and his interview is in September and he’ll be back in October.

My fiancé comes from a really wealthy family and well I don’t lol. They pay for my trips to visit him in South Korea and I know I’m lucky. They promised me I’ll be set for life. My fiancés dad I’m sorry to say this but he’s a big asshole. He always brags and he’s passive aggressive but I play nice and I keep to myself.

Before I came to South Korea I was diagnosed with high blood pressure. For me it’s all from crappy genetics. My doctor told me that just not my diet but my genetics and now I’m taking medication. I’m 4’11 and I weigh 118 pounds. I suffer with body dysmorphia and an ED but I didn’t disclose that to my father in law. My fiancé shared this information with my permission to his parents before I came incase something happened to me and what we can do to help me.

Since I’ve been here in South Korea my father in law has made countless comments about my high blood pressure. Whenever I eat any meal with him he’ll say “wow you eat so much” or if I don’t eat “wow you don’t eat”. He’s also not understanding my high blood pressure condition. It’s like I really can’t win. He ended up telling me that he wants me and my fiancé to change our diet. I just say there and didn’t say a word.

I told my fiancé what he said and my fiancé said that both his parents make comments about my diet. I started to cry and said “so the few times I’ve eaten with them they can form an opinion on my diet?”. Plus we all eat the same food and I just eat my food in a smaller portion! Now when it comes to eat with them I can’t bring myself to share a meal with them. I also spent $60 on probiotics so when I do eat I don’t appear as bloated or anything of the sorts.

Before all of this his parents booked a trip for me, my fiancés aunt, and them to Japan. Tbh with yall it’s not the Japan we expect like it’s not Tokyo or Osaka. His parents had us join a tour group and it’s all in Korean like I don’t know what’s going on. Plus the stuff in their travel agenda is for retired people (I’m sorry if that sounds brutal!). Funny enough his parents told me to choose where we go in Japan and I suggested Osaka. I guess that didn’t happen because we’re doing exactly what his parents want to do. After the comments his parents made about my diet I broke down and told my fiancé I can’t have a 3 day trip with them in Japan due to the food comments. My fiancé told me he’s going to talk to his parents and tell them to stop. Also, my fiancé is busy at work and couldn’t join the trip.

Since we arrived in Japan I have been anxious and depressed. Of course I don’t show it but I constantly feel like crying. I when told my fiancé through text that I want him to be here that he needs to find a way to be here. Let’s be real I know he can’t but I’m suffering here. I can’t eat in front of his parents and I feel horrible about myself. I also told my fiancé I wish I didn’t leave Korea for this. I know that’s brutal and I feel bad but imagine not feeling comfortable to eat in front of your in laws? Then when you do eat they make you feel like crap?

I’m not happy here at all. I know it’s Japan like this adult Disney world but I’m not even happy here in Japan. Should I feel bad for what I told my fiancé about not wanting to even be in Japan because of his parents? He’s not upset with what I said and he’s being very understanding. But I feel like what I said sounded so bad like I don’t want to come across as entitled. I just can’t do this alone and I feel so depressed. I have been apart from my fiancé since February I just want time with him. I came on this vacation to be with him and have our time together. Luckily it’s only 3 days but even then it feels so long.

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Posted
3 months ago