Hello!

Basically, I've been friends with someone for a while, and I feel like I've been developing some feelings lately. I'm debating whether I should tell them as a way to shut it down for myself, or shut up and hope it doesn't show up and fuck things up between us.

I've drafted (and auto translated from my main language out of laziness. It sounds kinda flat because of that, but eh, it's not that important and I don't feel like it'll matter too much, the context is what's important) this message that I'm debating to send them - or tell them in person by telling them I wanna chat about something 1 on 1, and leaving them the choice whether I do it by text or face to face:

So Bobby (Name changed) I wanted to be transparent with you about something, which I'm going to make sure doesn't affect you until things calm down

Basically, since your hospitalisation, I've realised that I'm >really< afraid of losing you, and the first time you went clubbing really confirmed that, I'm often worried about you, and I want things to go as well as possible in your life. That, and the fact that for the last 3 weeks or so, I've been really down with work (I know you've seen it too, as you talked about it with my mum when she picked you up at the station), means that I think I'm developing some feelings for you. Don't worry, I'm not an idiot, and I'm not going to act on it, and encouraging you to find someone is part of it, I want you to have someone who really suits you and someone you'll be comfortable with.

I'm fully aware that this isn't the case between us, between the 7-year age difference and the imbalances that creates, what I know about your preferences in terms of people too, plus the mini-distance between us that we've built up together to be able to get closer as friends and on top of that, the fact that I don't really have any stability in my life at the moment (housing mentally, no kidding).

On top of that, I care about you too much to break up what we have, I hope you'll still be a part of my life years from now, and I feel like I'm in a bind: either I don't tell you anything and you'll feel that something's different until my brain takes over and calms things down, or I tell you so that it's out in the open, so that I can get rid of it and you won't have to wonder if something's wrong. I preferred the latter and I hope it won't make you too uncomfortable If you want the short version: I'm an idiot, I'm sorry if I do something stupid or if I'm weird for 1-2 weeks, please talk to me about it, and on your side, build your best life, because damn it, you're a great person and I want to see you happy (and when we both have someone, judge who's the gayest (we're both bi) once and for all).

I'm asking you people your opinion about this, which probably isn't easy as there's a lot of things that affect a relationship between people and a small text cannot capture that. Should I send this message (and improve it in any way?) or should I wait and hope I don't end up distancing myself too much trying to protect our friendship and making them feel like something's going on? He's currently with a friend for the week, and the first impression I gave her was NOT one she enjoyed because I told her I didn't want to see her fling's nude without their consent

Edit: After thinking about it I see 3 options

1- "I'll be off for a few weeks but everything is okay don't worry. I'm staying vague to avoid grossing you out and feeling like I'm betraying your trust" and if he presses (which I'm quite sure won't happen as he'd rather avoid awkward talks most of the time), tell him 2- quiet and hope for the best 3-sending the draft or saying it face to face

TLDR: Have very close friend. Brain dumb and develops some feelings. Should I shut up and let it pass, or tell them ?

Thanks a lot :)