I 27F recently started hanging out with these two girls Katie 27F and Lani 28F. I’ve noticed when we hang out that Lani is almost always on her phone, either scrolling through Instagram or swiping on dating apps, etc. Sometimes even randomly watching videos at full volume. I’m of the opinion that when you’re with other people you should try to be present so I find the behavior kind of rude, but Katie never does this so I’ve just tolerated Lani’s phone habits. To clarify, checking your phone to respond to a text or look something up is completely fine but being engrossed in it for hours is not.

Well recently Katie got a new job and is going to be moving away soon and Lani seems to be under the impression that me and her are going to continue to be super close. She seems a little aloof at times but other than that we get along pretty well. But to be honest I’m not sure I want to keep hanging out with her alone if she’s just gonna ignore me and stare at her phone.

I wish I could say this was an isolated incident but I know so many people our age who have the attention span of a peanut and literally can’t function without multitasking with a phone or something else. I’ve generally ended up cutting people like this off as I’d rather just spend time alone than constantly being ignored by a friend.

I know Lani can be a bit oblivious so part of me almost wants to bring up how her constant phone use bothers me and makes me not want to continue the friendship. It’s entirely possible she never realized that this is off putting. But I also don’t want to offend her or put Katie in an awkward position if Lani takes it the wrong way. But at the same time I’d feel bad slow ghosting her especially when her best friend is moving away.

How can I bring this up to Lani in a sensitive way? Or should I just give up on the friendship to not cause drama?