Hey everyone me (27m) and my gf (29f) recently broke up and I need some opinions on if it was valid and where to really go from here.

We’ve been together for two and a half years and Currently we both live at home with our parents, she has an eight year old daughter that I’ve quickly taken the role of step dad of and things had been really good between us. About 6 months prior we had an argument and broke up for a few days but got back together because she accused me of cheating and I wasn’t at all.

Fast forward to now, we had a conversation a month ago and I said that in 6 months I get a raise at my job and would be making more money, we should consider moving in. We had always talked about moving in and getting engaged and our plan was always to get engaged first and then move in once she graduated nursing school. She currently has a job in the ER however does not make that much and we agreed upon a 60/40 split.

After I said that she immediately began scheduling apartment tours without consulting with me, she would make tours at 11 pm the next day when I was off and give me last minute notice which slightly annoyed me but I put it to the back of my mind. We ended up seeing an apartment on Tuesday and it was not anything special, it was kinda crappy but was in our price range. After the apartment tour I had said to her that I didn’t really like it and regardless of whether we go I don’t want to get stuck paying 90% of the rent because she has the tendency to blow her paychecks as soon as she gets them.

She immediately became annoyed at me for making that comment and it was a little awkward. She said that she thought I was annoyed at her for scheduling apartment tours as I said to her that I was a little annoyed for making tours without talking to me first, she immediately exploded and said “we have a shared calendar, I know when we’re both off” and I replied “yeah but you can still talk to me”. I asked her then which she wants first, a ring or to move in (remember, the plan was to always get the ring first) to which she said, I want both. I looked at her and said if we do this it’s going to be another expense and your ring is going to get pushed back.

After that she said “you’re the one who wanted to start looking at apartments “, to which I said I wanted to start looking in 6 months not now. She got incredibly annoyed, said “ that’s not what I said but okay keep gaslighting me”. Once we got in the car I asked her what she wanted to do and she said “I want to break up” and I said “okay if that’s really what you want”. As we were driving back to my house she started to insult me, she said I was a coward for not wanting to leave my parents and a pussy for not leaving mommy and daddies. I said “wow you’re going to insult me now?” And she said “you insult me every day, you don’t take me out, you don’t do anything special for me”.

We then pulled up to my house and I got out and she drove away. It’s been 3 days and I feel absolutely get wrenched and broken. She made a tik tok saying “maturing is realizing when the breakup was the best thing that ever happened to you” and that just destroyed me. I’m not really sure where to go from here and need any advise possible