Been in a sexless marriage for over ten years. My average is about once a year on average we have sex and most of the time she wants me to finish after about twenty minutes or so. My longest dry spell was over two years. We have so many augments about our marriage their is a long list which includes our sex life. She refuses counseling or any therapy of any kind. Once I told a family friend she found out and I was in the shit list and physically abused she small so didn’t harm me much. I've received a long list of excuses so I don't really know what is true or just whatever. Our arguments is always "okay I'll change" then the next day back to normal as though there was never an argument in the first place. We do have a daughter and she has used her against me. Threats of divorce has included never seeing my daughter again which my wife is a green card holder so she has said she would would go to her home country. Or drain me of every cent. Or put me in jail for what I have no idea how. Couple times she has actually harmed our daughter during these arguments once over the phone she made my daughter cry while I was on the phone. Her threats varies wildly so I have no idea what she would do. So for the past year or so when we do have an argument when she asks if I want a divorce I just say I can't and she smiles and goes her merry way with her day.