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Should it be okay to move on from my ex? Even if it might be temporarily?
I am a 19M in college at a party school. I had a girlfriend (19F) for the past 9 months, until she broke up with me about a week ago.
We broke up because we were arguing quite often, and she didnāt like how our arguments were only slightly improving, not at a rate which she was satisfied with. Basically, we were getting better at our problems and disagreements a bit too slowly for her liking, which I totally understand. She was often breaking down after these arguments, and the emotional toll these arguments would bring on her were enough for her to break our relationship apart.
Even though I did not want to break up, I understand why she did, and I believe it is completely valid.
However, when we broke up, she basically was implying that she just needed time to work on herself, and improve her mental health, before getting into a relationship again. In addition to this, she told me that she doesnāt want to move on to another boyfriend, and basically sees the same thing happening if she tries again with a different guy anytime soon.
So there is basically somewhat of an implication that she needs this time to herself, whether it be weeks, months, or years, but eventually when she is ready for a relationship, she wants to get back together.
She even reassured this assumption a couple nights after the breakup where I texted her and told her that I might not ever move on from her (I know dramatic lol), and she reciprocated, saying she will not and does not want to move on, but still does not want to get back together.
Okay here is where I donāt know if this is a valid thing to do:
To put it bluntly, since weāve broken up, there are now opportunities, that I am interested in, to hookup with some girls at my college. I have been flirting with a couple, but I kind of feel guilty, because I feel like my ex has the intention to get back together, an intention I am willing to reciprocate, so starting to talk to/flirt with/have sex with other girls feels a bit like cheating.
But itās not cheating right? Since weāre broken up? She even reiterated many times that weāre broken up, not just a ābreakā in the relationship.
Should I tell my ex that I am currently entertaining new women? No right? But I feel guilty making her think Iām just going to be 100% available whenever sheās done healing, because what if Iāve moved on by that point with somebody else?
Iām not sure what Iām really looking for by posting this. Maybe just a general idea of whether or not I should be entertaining the possibility of other relationships right now, because we are technically broken up.
I can clarify anything that needs clarification.
TLDR: Ex likely wants to get back together sometime in the future, I also would like this future. However in the meantime, should it be fine to try to hook up and date other women, even though I have not completely rejected the idea of my ex coming back into my life?
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