So I‘ve been with my girlfriend for about seven months now and we already went through some pretty rough up and downs. We met when we were both working in a hotel complex and had rooms right next to each other, which meant that we were seeing eachother everyday. After about 2 months we got together. She told me right from the beginning that she had a disturbing relationship before me, and that she has a huge fear of loss and becoming dependent of someone. Her anxiety always put a stress on our relationship, it caused our sex life to be very irregular, she was crying atleast once a day because of her anxiety, I was always there to hold her in my arms and to support her. For a period of time I couldn’t kiss or even hug her, but I always stayed by her side, and both of us put a huge effort into bettering that, which we eventually did. After we stopped working there, we both lived about 200km away from each other and see us about every 3 weeks for the weekend. However, going from not seeing me at all to seeing me for multiple days in a row put a lot of stress on her. She was crying more frequently, but we always fought through it. I really always want to be there to support her, no matter what. She told me that I should only be there for her if I actually can, and that she doesn’t want to put me through to much emotional stress. But I didn’t listen. I could never tell her that it is too much for me when she was crying in front of me. These 7 months of emotional challenges were very tough and I think I didn’t really see it. So a few days ago, when she was crying again, it suddenly all came up in me, I thought that I had neglected myself all the time to support her, and that the only way was to leave her. I went outside to think about that for about 10 minutes, which in hindsight was the most short sighted decision ever, and then told her that I couldn’t be with her anymore because I want to focus on myself. Moments after saying that out loud I realized the mistake I just made. She really means so much to me, and I triggered her worst fear by saying that, even when it wasn’t actually what I wanted. I told her then that I am so sorry and that it is not actually what I want, and that I have to think about what made me do that. We have since been in contact and we both seem to want to work it out, I truly believe in a future with her. Obviously, I have really broken her trust and triggered her deepest fear, whicj took a long time for us to overcome. Do you have any ideas or advice for me? Anything is appreciated

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