I guess I should start with some backstory. My fiancée and I first met when we were 21. We met at a mutual friends bar party and sparks just flew the first time we met up. I have never loved a woman as much as I love her and J would die for her if asked. She is very much the same. We are ride or die for one another and have seen so much happen over the years. And while we have had more than our fair share of arguments and hard times, we always got through them together.

But as of late, the relationship has been struggling and I know the main reason. I am not well-endowed: I believe I’m about 4.7 inches or so, with a 6 inch girth. We have always used toys and I thought that was enough. But my size has become a problem for the last four months.

Four months ago, I was in bed with my fiancée, and we had a discussion about previous sexual partners. She brought up her exes and talked about penis size. Apparently I was the smallest man she had been with, as most of her exes were 7 or more inches. This wouldn’t have been a problem normally.

Worrying about the past is just so stupid to me, but she brought up the fact that they had made her orgasm from penetration alone. When I asked if I had ever done that, she just dodged the question until I pressed for an answer. She admitted that no, I had never made her orgasm with my penis by itself and that was why we often used her toys when we had sex. She had never experienced this problem before and had faked her orgasms whenever we didn’t use toys.

I asked if she thought I was small, and she admitted that she had spoken to her girl-friends about this very topic because she knew it was going to come up. They had all told her not to tell me that I was small and to avoid this subject all together. I was hurt by this because she hadn’t told me about these conversations. We share just about everything and I was also hurt by the fact she had disclosed that kind of private information about me to her friends. Since that conversation I’ve fallen into a slump. I’ve seen her friends make a joke about my size in their group-chat and tease my fiancée.

My depression has significantly worsened as well. My sexual libido is gone and I feel extremely unattractive and disgusting. It doesn’t help that my fiancée tried to explain to me that we could just buy penis extenders or that I could focus on my mouth/hands and not have to use my penis. That conversation led to a fight about me feeling unwanted, because sex had shifted from penetration to just using toys on her. We have grown apart in this time due to the tension and her high sex drive has made her frustrated when I don’t reciprocate her sexual feelings, but I explained I hadn’t been in the mood to even touch myself as of late.

As of last week, after saying that her bedroom needs weren’t being met and I wasn’t the happy man I was when she met me, my fiancée went over to stay with one of her girl-friend’s houses. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anymore. I love her with all of my being and don’t want to lose her, but I feel like someone just sucked every bit of confidence and pride out of me. How can I explain to her the feelings I’ve been having and tell her that I don’t feel wanted or attractive? I don’t want to lose her and I hate that we’re apart right now.

EDIT: Girth is different than width. Width is how WIDE it is. Girth is measuring the circumference of the penis.