We have been together for 8 years. We have always loved gaming, together and separately, and we both game a lot. Like, 1000s of hours in our favorite games. We always had what I felt like a balanced relationship. Sometimes we would play for hours together, and sometimes we would be interested in different games, so we would play different games in the same room, still able to talk and hangout and share moments in our games. If either of us needed time together, we would just game together for a bit or watch a movie or something, then get back to our games.

2 months ago he has gotten back into WOW. He has never played it while we were together, but he said he played it a bunch as a teenager, he was even in a famous guild or something? I tried playing it but it's just not for me. So he plays with his brother and a group a friends.

He plays almost everyday, for a hours a day. Not unusual for either of us. He plays with his headset on talking to his group. Also not unusual, we have both done that together and separately, but this does mean we can't casually hang out while he plays.In addition, he has scheduled raids 3x a week for 3-5 hours at a time. That's never happened, but I totally understand it, and our lives aren't scheduled much so it doesn't interfere with anything. On not raid days, I'll often come to him to talk or something and he tells me he has to focus for the next 20 minutes and then we can talk. Not a problem, I've played those kinds of games before, and I know I can talk to him in an emergency.

But it feels like getting to hang out with him has gotten slippery somehow. Like, he'll get a text from his brother about some event they can do together and will ask if he can. When we watch something together, he always falls asleep, probably from staying up playing. When we play games together, he just seems less enthusiastic than before. If I get up to go make food or use the bathroom, he's immediately playing, and I have to wait a few minutes to get back to what we were doing. He's always respectful and if I tell him i want to hang out he wraps things up, and if I tell him I want him to spend a few hours with me he does.

One thing that happened recently was that I've asked a few times if he wanted to smoke weed with me, and he said he didn't want to because it would make playing harder. So on the night we had picked to be our night, I asked if he wanted to smoke and he said yes. About an hour in the was like "oh man, I actually think WOW would be really fun while high now that I am high. Not that I'm saying I want to play! But it would be fun..." Me, being high and totally understanding craving certain activities said it was fine. About a week later I was smoking and offered him some and he again said it wouldn't be fun while playing WOW. I don't know, that felt like it meant something but?

I have brought up to him that he's playing a lot, and he agreed but brought up the time I spent like an entire week doing nothing but playing Fallout 4 (and ok, fair). We have always had gaming be a huge part of our relationship, so this shouldn't be that different, but it feels like it is. He always seems like, itchy to get back into the game.

I'm not sure if this is all in my head or what. My birthday is coming up and we have things planned, and it will make me very sad if I get the feeling he'd rather be playing WoW.

TLDR: My husband is gaming more heavily than before (I think), and I'm feeling a bit neglected.