TLDR: headline

Me 3 years ago: let's open up. lovers would be great! Nothing too serious. Also me: kisses a new girl, ends up having 2 relationships. Little clue of 4 and casual sex with friends. Happy ever after.

I have never been romantically involved with someone, without having the capacity to escalate. Now that may be my situation and I really don't want to hurt this wonderful person that I just met. I clearly have the powerful position and (thus) the responsibility, as I'm the saturated one. She doesn't want a relationship atm (explicitly stated before we meet), but that's only true until it's not. I really want to connect, be emotionally close, so one and one. All the stuff you usually do to build hardcore commited relationships. But I only want to do it now and then. We live some hours apart and I don't have time for more anyway. Of course we have agreed on all this but emotions take little notice of agreements. It's still early days, but I have a feeling that we might get rather close and romantic if we don't actively slow it down. I'm afraid that she at some point would want more than I can offer, and that non of us will realise as fast as we should. I really like the concept of comets, so if not now, I will surely try and build that kind of relation later.

SO, what are some mistakes that people tend to make in comet relations despite good intentions and honest communication? What can I do