My partner of 10 months and I had tickets to see the Lumineers last week. She ended up having to work so I gave the tickets away. I really wanted to go to the show with her. Once she couldn’t I didn’t want to go with someone else. It just didn’t feel right.

Two nights ago one of her other partners offered to take her to the Lumineers show a week later in Milwaukee. We talked about it, and I would rather have her enjoy the show than wait until we can see them together.

I’m a little hurt. It feels like she’s going on the date that we had planned with a different partner. I realize I could have rescheduled the concert to the Milwaukee show a week later, but I had just lost money on the first show, I didn’t really want to rebuy tickets I had just given away.

I understand that each date is unique, and that her and I can see any other concert or even another Lumineers show some other time. But at the same time, she couldn’t make the show work with me after we committed to it, but now she’s going to go with her other partner right after.

There is some core wounding here. She and I have become a lot like nesting partners, so our time is often busy. Running errands. Fitting in moments around work and kids and life. I love it and it’s intimate, but we don’t get a lot of dates. Her other partner gets more date time, but much much less time overall. I’ve started to ask for more official “date” time, but that takes time because we are busy. It stings that she cancelled a date with me and is going on essentially the same date with him a week later, even though she had good reason.

I know I’m being petty. And that overall I want her to have the experience vs waiting for me. I’m just struggling and I needed to put it out there.

Thanks.