This is a vent driven by loneliness, and it's all my own fault.

I am a very gay woman and solo poly. This means it's really hard to date.

I don't put up with bullshit or drama at all. I don't want to fuck people's boyfriends most of the time.

Also, I have chased all of the serious partners of yesteryear away with some combination of insecurity and bullishness.

I go to sleep at 9:30 pm and wake up at 5 am to go running in the forest. No one wants to put up with that. Also, I have a weird diet.

Seems like life would be better if I changed some habits to make myself more datable, but also some part of me is holding a candle for the idea that the perfect partners will drop into my life and accept me for who I am while not also mandating that I fuck their boyfriends or husbands.

Advice appreciated.