So first things first, I have had a very tumultuous experience so far with opening my monogamous relationship. As evidenced by my previous posts.

I want to say that I made a breakthrough. I have been carrying all this pain and hurt about my husband wanting to be poly, and today something inside of me clicked. I did alot of introspection about myself and realized that although I have had monogamous leanings before I can choose to be polyamorous too. This made me realize that this could actually work!

I realized that although my husband wants other relationships that yes I am enough. That yes he still loves me deeply. That our relationship doesn't have to end if we do the work. That his commitment to me is not changed. With that being said, I have been doing an extraordinary amount of emotional work and it feels like it is paying off.

So my husband's lady friend, he has been reluctant in labeling what they have I think in an effort to protect my feelings, and I had a long talk. We had been friendly before things got difficult. I wanted to reopen the lines of communication and apologize for how lousy I had been towards her. It was a good talk and I feel we both want the same thing. Or at least the impression I get. I expressed that I don't want to date her but I would like to be on good terms. She has said that's what she wants as well. We came to the conclusion we need to all three sit down and talk about us, what we would like to see ideally yet realistically, what our individual needs/boundaries are, what we can expect in terms of time spent etc.

My questions are these, what are some questions or things that should be discussed? What is considered realistic in terms of time division? What are some resources that could help us get started in our conversation?

Thank you for any feedback. I actually feel happy and excited!