I’ve been poly for a very long time in my heart but against my best efforts 9 times out of 10 I can’t seem to make it past the first date with people. One of the only times I did it was with a woman and we didn’t Make it to date 4 and then I blew it. It’s never happened with a man. I do have some contingencies which I’m upfront about. I don’t hook up or kiss until I’ve been dating f someone a while. I’ve literally had people get offended that I wouldn’t kiss them. Like I was accusing them of being dirty or something.

For the longest time I convinced myself guys just saw it as a challenge to sleep with me and when I didn’t put out they lost interest. But honestly at this point I feel like I have a first date curse and feel pretty defeated.

For what it’s worth I do have a nesting partner who I’ve been married to for 17 years and he has a girlfriend. I don’t think it’s related to the city we live in bc I’ve lived in several places during this poly journey. Thanks for letting me vent. I don’t really have any poly friends and monogamous people just don’t get it.