So yeah my gf of 6 months, let’s call her Sadie cause rules ig, asked to be poly, and I am feeling mixed. We were open before only sexually, but She said she already has feelings for other people, who she has already had sex with. Honestly I feel a little betrayed because she said she would immediately cut them off if she got feelings, but here we are.

My main concern is that I would be replaced, or she would love me less, or we would have to share our life that we’ve made and that we’re going to have together. She assured me that I would always be her “main partner” that she priorities and lives more than any other partner, and I didn’t even know that was a thing w polyamory, I didn’t really understand it before today, and that her being poly would not interfere w our time spent together, and that she can keep her partners separate. The way she explains it makes me feel comfortable but I’m still uneasy.

I can understand, I have occasionally felt feelings of love w other girls who r my friends but never followed through. But I guess monogamy is easier for me despite those emotions.

I have really bad abandonment issues tho, and every girl I’ve ever loved before has cheated on me, left me for someone else, or abandoned me, and my mother was very absent in my life. It’s hard for me to imagine how she could love me more than her other partners or how they wouldn’t change our love.

I’d be happy to have my life and love w Sadie, and have a gf or 2 as “secondary partners” as long as our relationship and dynamic or love would not change. I’m just so scared, I’ve been neglected and cast aside so much and if she did it to me I’d be so Heartbroken, and part of my trust in her is lost.