NP and I were talking the other day and you know what term I hate? Fluid bonding. I get that its a descriptor for sex without a barrier, where fluid is exchanged... but I can't help like the word bonding here is somewhat problematic.

Sex is different for everybody. Every person and partnership will value sex differently in their relationship, and I think its great that it can be so individualized. Some people may place a lot of value on sex without a barrier, but for myself that's just sex with a different risk level. The importance the word "bonding" places on sex gives me the ick, and makes me feel like the relationship is more special simply because there was direct contact.

I see so many posts of people upset that their partners have "fluid bonded" with another; While I do think sticking to discussed boundaries is important for STI transmission and trust, I can't help but think that on some level this is also a heirarchy issue for many. So many unhappy posts seem to equate fluid exchange with intimacy reserved for their most important/closest partners rather than simply safety/pregnancy risk.

Sex without a barrier for me simply means I know the person well enough that I trust their practices and their regular testing. I trust them to be honest about new partners they've also had sex with. I trust them to care for me. Those things all mean the person is important, but if I needed to use a barrier for health reasons they wouldn't be any less important, so why the word bonding rather than exchange?

What are your thoughts? How do you navigate sex without barriers in your relationships?