Tonight my wife (F42) and I (M42) reviewed our past rules and now only have boundaries. This has been a relationship goal of mine and I wanted to share. We have been practicing polyamory for the past 5 years of our 19 year marriage. Our abbreviated boundaries are:

• Use discretion in public.

• Basic hygiene after dates.

• Practice safe sex.

Although we started with rules the intent was to eliminate them over time and our partners had knowledge about the rules. Also, we did not start dating anyone until we agreed on no vetos.

We are not some sort of super evolved polyamorist. The rules were there to protect us from our insecurities. We still have insecurities, but have grown over time to deal with them better. The reason we were reviewing our old rules is because I’m dating someone new after three years of not having a second partner and my wife’s other relationship is going on 4 years so there hadn’t been a need. There will be new challenges. My new partner is local as opposed to long distance so I will be able to see her much more often. And my new relationship is budding romantically which is something I didn’t get from my last relationship.