I'm (20 TM) new to poly. I've been researching for at least a year, probably more. To get eased into it I decided to just have multiple FWB before delving into multiple romantic relationships. I did that for a few months and it went well. Now some of my FWB are turning into more of a romantic thing.

I like rhyming names, so I'm just gonna call these people by that. Things with Harold (21M) are great. No problems there. However things with Gerald (23M) aren't going well for me when it comes to sex. I don't need sex in all my relationships, it's just that I don't like something about the way Gerald does things.

Gerald doesn't like to listen to me about what I need with sex. For example, I said I need a lot of foreplay, and he did foreplay for about a minute and said "Ok, we're good now.". I also handed him some lube and told him to use it, but he didn't. He just spit on his hand and rubbed it on his penis. When I told him that I was starting to have pain during sex he just said "Ok, but can I at least finish?".

Everything else in my relationship with Gerald is almost perfect. We have fun together and we've got a connection. I'm going to at least put a boundary in place and tell him I won't have sex with him for awhile and when I do that I will stop again if he doesn't listen to what I need. It's just that I have this thought that says "You should leave him". Then I think "If I'm thinking it then does that mean I should actually leave him?".

If I'm thinking about it, should I just trust my intuition? I'm afraid of making a mistake and missing out on what could be a great relationship. The more I write about this the more I'm leaning towards ending it.