My (29F) NP/fiancee (29F) has been talking to someone from Feeld who lives across the country, and he has a visit to our hometown scheduled next month. She’ll be spending most of the long weekend and potentially an overnight with him. This is daunting for me as the most we’ve done is have sex with other people together and on our own, but without much emotional connection and have at most spent 3-4 hours with them.

I’ve been working on enjoying solo time, and planning activities with friends in anticipation of that weekend, but I also wanted to plan a date or two. I had a coffee date scheduled for this morning with a man I had connected with on Feeld, and he ended up standing me up and blocking me completely out of the blue. It’s been really hard to keep my head up because we’re both attractive bi women, so we’ve each had no problem getting matches, but we’ve just had so many unfortunate experiences (mostly with cis hetero men). I could list them out but this post would be too long.

Now that she has someone who has shown some potential coming to visit, it’s hard not to compare myself to her and feel bad about myself. I enjoy the idea of polyamory, and ultimately I want her to enjoy herself that weekend, but I’m getting so frustrated with dating and dating apps. Some words of encouragement would be appreciated.