Been in the group reading and taking it all in. Been poly my whole life.. two marriages in (currently divorcing #2)… Finally getting my grove back (yes I’m Stella 🤣), healing from many traumas, getting excellent mental health care. Had a great breakthrough week. TLDR warning Newly single from both my marriage & a poly quad. Still dating one of the quad members (Heart) Still friends with the meta after a breakup (Rain) Not talking to ex husband except for parenting (Alter) New relationship with a friend who fulfills needs that aren’t able to be met rn with (Panther). (Rain) is trying to see if they wanna date. I don’t wanna continue to date them after our messy breakup but I don’t mind maintaining friendship. I just don’t see anything left romantic and they don’t meet my emotional needs but they are a descent friend. (Heart)has a lot of trauma with (Rain) and with life in general. They are going through what I went through about 9/10 months ago on a personal level. So I can be there for (Heart) on a support level and help guide them without inserting myself{(Rain) seems to think I’m their new relationship therapist} but (Heart) comes to me wondering how to translate because I’ve already walked in their shoes. They’re just looking for hugs & reassurance. Now (Panther) and I connect on an amazing level. We both have the same needs rn. Physical connection, talking about things we both have in common (we both have the same background with personal struggles). I have also progressed through CBT in this area to be further mentally than (Panther) so I can support them emotionally because I can show them what it’s like on the other side. I have reached such heights these last two months mentally to be able to hold space for myself while giving support to my clan (our words my partners and I use) without letting go of my boundaries. Six, heck even three months ago I would’ve lost my mind. In the last three days I’ve been able to: -take personal time for me -stick to my boundaries AND vocalize them (especially with (Rain) which has ALWAYS been hard af) -maintain a schedule (so hard with mental health recovery & severe PtSD & ADHD) -give space for (Panther) to open up and express feelings -give space to (Heart) to open up & express feelings -get positive results (smiles & hugs) -finally give (Rain) clarity they were looking for and closure I was looking for(instead of over text like they’ve tried to do now for months) I hate communication over text unless it’s with someone that has my same communication style. (Heart & Panther both use reels, vids, memes & visual auditory stuff like I do. We just understand better through that type of communication… words are hard for the three of us). I’m just so excited to be in such a great place in my poly journey and mental health journey that I had to share what feels like the biggest win I’ve had in a long long time 🥰🌈