So my partner is going through a break up from her primary partner. They were together close to 10-years. They hadn’t always been poly, and I was the first secondary partner in the equation since they became poly.

Something that’s been difficult is they still live together, and the now ex is taking things quite difficulty, especially since my partner still has me to lean on. The ex is dealing with a lot of emotions and my partner very much so still wants to comfort and be there to support. What do I do? Do I give the space for her to comfort and support the ex even though I know it’s not going to be helpful? Do I set harder boundaries that they shouldn’t do certain things because she’s no longer that person anymore?

I’ve only gone through monogamous relationships and this is my partner’s first break up ever so it’s difficult and different for the both of us.