Brief background: I’m a 31y/o male married to a 30y/o male. I had a shitty school year (I’m a teacher) and ran away for a 56 day solo trip to Europe. We’re more so experimenting with polyamory . So far we’ve had sex with other people but haven’t dated outside the marriage yet.

Anyways, I started my trip in Dublin where I chatted with Patrick (fake name). Patrick is this cute Irishman with a great personality. Unfortunately, it was just a one night stay to recover from the long leg of travel before I really started my trip. So we couldn’t really met up as he livings with family. But, we decided we’d try to keep in touch and meet try to meet up when I came back in July. We talked all summer and it was nice. I loved the solitude but it was nice to have someone to talk that as in the same time zone. When I got close to Dublin I reached out and proposed a big “romcom” final hurray in Dublin. He’s a movie buff and I was living out every American in Europe cliche. So that’s what we did. We rented a hotel room, got tickets to go see The Barbie Movie, and left him in charge of taking me to a good place to eat. We did all that plus hopped around a few bars, made out in said bars, and finished the night in the room— it’s not the main focus but yes, the sex was great. I had one more city to visit before going back to Dublin for a final overnight before heading home. Date #1 went excellent so we planned a #2. Same general format: dinner, movie, making out in bars. Only difference is there was no sex.

Well, turns out I caught feelings pretty damn fast. He knows all about my feelings I’ve extremely open about it. He doesn’t share them to the extent I do but I understand how irrational my feelings are. We still talk daily for the most part. However, he recently started dating a guy and they’ve since gone exclusive. I’m obviously happy for him. Buuuut, feelings are irrational. When he told they became exclusive I spent that entire day all sad and jealous. I told him I needed to take a break. I took a week to clear my head. Buuuut, the jealous feeling is still there. We have gone back to talking but now I just cope with the feelings.