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I (41f) have an anxious attachment style and I have a really hard time reintegrating back into my day to day life with my husband and family after my biweekly dates with my lover where we often take MDMA.
The next morning my lover and I send each other one text and then we normally don't connect again for a couple days, then see each other 2 weeks later.
Anybody got suggestions on how to do this well?
Edited to add: I know that the MDMA is part of the issue and am willing to address that. But the issue is also there when we don't take drugs so I think it's bigger and would value reintegration tips beyond using less drugs.
He's been pretty clear lately that the degree of texting is already overwhelming for him...which is...challenging for me since we don't actually text that often. But I'm trying to deal...
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These are really great questions, thank you. I think part of my issue is my anxiety. He's avoidant so I aim to give him space between our dates and our texts are limited to a "thinking of you" here and there. After long...8 hour...dates where we talk about a ton of things and have a lot of sex, it's hard to go back to regular life. I definitely divest from the rest of my life when I'm with him because it is just us, separate from everything else, on pretty epic dates.
This looks like me waking up sad the next morning, and sometimes for a couple days. Like, empty. The drugs are definitely part of this, but they're not the full picture.
In our relationship he's currently indicating he wants to text less (we already only text every few days), so I'm not seeing an opportunity here for increased integration of him with my life.