My partner (25nb) and I (22nb) been thinking of opening our relationship sexually for a while, and this week we decided to try it. One of the reasons we think or could be good is bc my gf has a much higher sex drive than me, which means I sometimes feel guilty for not fulfilling her needs.

Now that she can see other people, that pressure on me to have sex with her lessens, meaning I’m more likely to have sex with her and probably more frequently too.

I’m really struggling tho. We’ve set a lot of boundaries to make sure that we’re both comfortable and so that no one gets hurt. But it’s like there’s this voice in my head telling me that she’s going to leave me for someone else, and that she’d rather spend time with others rather than with me bc she doesn’t enjoy my company (which isn’t actually true, I’ve just had really low self esteem for a very long time).

I’m hoping that this will pass and I’ll be able to see sense and get over it but I’m worried. Last time we tried polyamory and then went back to monogamy it nearly ended our relationship.

Does or get any easier? I don’t want to feel so insecure all the time, it’s getting us both down. Any advice would be much appreciated.