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My fiance would rather fall asleep on the phone with her LDR then come to bed and sleep with me, she says I normally work this day anyways (we usually only get 2 nights together) and she's mad at me for asking this. It really hurts that she'd rather fall asleep with him than come to bed with me.
Is this day usually one that she spends with her other partner? If so, changing that schedule just because you’re home would be icky hinging anyway. Keeping agreements is important!
Definitely talk to her! There’s a difference between what you think and what is actually going on a lot of the time! It might make all the sense in the world that to you, what was obvious was opting to spend time with you because of your time constraints / the opportunity arising, but she might be coming from a different mindset entirely / clearly wanted to allocate that time to spend with her other partner! Maybe especially since they’re long distance!
It sounds like you guys skipped some steps and would benefit from a lot more communication and planning!
Try expressing your hurt and that you want more time (if that’s something you can manage with work) and go from there!
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I meant an agreement with her other partner. Did you ask if she had set that time for him/ would spending time with you mean her changing set plans with him?
Either way you’re allowed to feel sad about it! I’m sorry you’re hurting. I think in a situation like this the thing to do is to open that line of communication with her/explain to her how you’re feeling and why. She’ll hopefully be able to explain where she was coming from!
Has she been hinging properly otherwise?