Hi. I’m terrified. I’ve been with my partner for 12 years. We are both 27 years old. He is my best friend. He’s loving, supportive, and I know I couldn’t ask for a better life partner. It’s the first healthy relationship I’ve ever had. I’ve suffered trauma in the past. ROCD started 3 months into the relationship. Felt like my world was destroyed. Im having a hard time with recovery. My feelings and thoughts feel like they are actually mine. The relationship feels wrong. It feels like I don’t want my partner anymore. My thoughts attack everything about him and my feelings towards him. I feel so devastated. I don’t want to feel this way. I want to be able to want the relationship. I want to be happy and live my life with him, but I feel like maybe the thoughts and feelings are true and the relationship has ran it’s course. This devastates me to no end. I’m afraid if I continue with recovery, I’ll realize that these are my true feelings. This is my biggest fear. I don’t want that, but the relationship feels so wrong. Being around my partner feels so wrong. Has anyone felt this way and went through with ERP and recovery? Did you stay and are happy now? Or does anyone have an advice? I’m so worried that this is all true because some of these thoughts and feelings seem so logical. Thank you.