Hello all! A friend and I (41F) were planning to head to Virtue and Vice party next Saturday (1 Feb). She can’t make it anymore and I’m really nervous about going on my own!

It’s my first time going to a play party but it’s something I’ve wanted to experience for a while. We thought this would be a good one to try as it seems more femme friendly and I liked their front and centre focus on consent. Also a bigger event feels like a good place for a newbie (ie getting lost in the crowd).

(1) Is this an accurate assessment? Or are there better places to try for a first time?

I’m pretty comfortable setting my boundaries, and really curious about exploring the scene but I think what is making me really nervous is going to an event on my own, especially in a size 20-22 body.

I’ve had a look at previous posts (glad to see others had questions about what shoes to wear :). Any advice appreciated but especially:

(2) how do you get settled in to the night and not end up standing awkwardly around? (3) is it really all shapes and sizes? Am I going to stand out as a size 20-22 40 year old in lingerie (and not in a good way)? (4) any tips for approaching others and introducing yourself? (5) what’s the best time to go? I want to strike the balance between arriving a bit later when lots of people are there but not missing the build up. (6) any other tips and advice for this solo newbie?