I (f24) have been with my boyfriend (m 31) for over 2.5 years now. We have been pretty happy together other than my boyfriend slipping up and I have found him texting other women. Not with intention of meeting with them. But just sexual texting. We have had disagreements for too long about this.

Our dynamic is that I am his submissive and he is my Dom. This also plays into how these conversations play out. He always promises to stop. I always believe him until I find something again. I got to a point where I was questioning if I would just be okay with him doing it, if it was only sexual.

So I decided to have a conversation with him. After some time he started expressing that he fears that this is the real him and he would need to be accepted for what he is. He is just attracted to women and he wants to talk to them. He wants to have sexual relationships with them possibly. It was a shock to me. It was like I've been slapped. I retorted with my emotions and accusations about how I am not enough for him and how he doesn't love me. But he was trying to explain to me that I don't see him. And I am not understanding what he's saying and that he's not interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with anyone else.

He wants me to be his sole romantic partner but sexually he just wants more. I asked him where does that put me in his life. He said it puts me as his potential wife, and forever partner that he would care for and protect emotionally and physically.

I have bad anxiety, panic attacks and overall bad mental health. He really helps me and takes care of me during those days. And generally in life he is always helping me with everything. I love away from family in a different country. He has introduced me to his. We have a very normal relationship outside of this and he has never hid me from anyone. His friends and family. The only pressing issue in our life is this. The fact that he wants to sexually be with multiple women.

He would never be open to sharing me. I have always been allowed to pursue sexual relationships with women. I am bisexual. But I am not allowed to do anything with other men. He wants me to only have his as a man. I don't understand how to proceed. In my heart I have too much love for this man and do not want to lose him. But I don't know yet if I am okay with having him pursue other women.

Is this a common thing way to starting out an ENM life? I am still trying to understand if I can agree. I am not being forced to do anything. But from what I understand if I want to pursue a life with him, these would continue. I am trying to understand him and see if it would work for me and if it is what I want from life.

Are there any women who have been in my similar situation and decided to continue the relationship? Do you have any tips for how I can set boundaries and ground rules for what is allowed and not. What are the red flags to be looking for? Due to the love I have for him as my boyfriend and the respect I have for him as my Dom, I am finding it difficult to understand if I am being delusional and crazy. I don't want to regret my decision to agree to this arrangement.

Could anyone help me bring some clarity. I am open to any suggestions or advices. I am very new to this. I do not mean to offend anyone. I am just trying to understand what can be done. I don't even know if there is a word for these kind of relationships. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you for your kindness.