Y'all- I have been struggling with this for a while, but haven't yet had a partner inquire further until now. I'd like to help them better understand, and hoping some of you might relate, and/or have words to help me explain this to my partner.

I (32 F) experience a great deal of internalized shame when it comes to the prospect of receiving oral sex. To the point where, if a partner has their face anywhere near between my legs, I tell them to come up and kiss me to divert the attention away.

It isn't that I don't want it, nor is it that I'm uncomfortable with receiving. It's really just a sort if embarrassment or shame that's unfounded. Unfortunately, it's often misconstrued as me not having the desire to receive. I've tried explaining what I'm feeling to partners, and they seem to misinterpret it instead to mean that I just don't want them to. But it isn't that 😅.

I've tried searching for articles on the topic, but sadly can only find articles that outline how some women aren't comfortable receiving oral sex, and in many ways, I very much desire to receive.

Does anyone have words to help me better explain this?