Long story short, girlfriend went on a two day camping trip and lied to me about going with anyone. I told her that I was uncomfortable with who she said she wanted to go with and agreed she wouldn’t; it wasn’t until I found out myself and caught her red handed until she admitted to any wrong doing. I am now at a juncture where she is heading overseas to see another partner and she has gotten so upset about using protection (condoms, dental dams, etc.) because I cannot trust her, nor her partners due to this. I just do not know how to navigate as she is claiming I am insane for asking for that. Please help.
That is not what polymory is at all. Any form of non-monogamy has a core relationship and is based on communication and trust. If you're just going to have separate relationships with no imput whatsoever from your core partner, then you don't have a core partner. You're just roommates.
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Even in a non-monogamous relationship, the outside relationships are part of the core relationship. It's not controlling to adhere to boundaries.