So I’m a gay guy in my 20s. I have been passive and submissive for most of my life, and I think it’s largely a result of how I was raised and grown up by my parents.

My dad can easily be described as authoritative and somewhat of a narcissist, and I would always have to agree with him growing up. Now I do this less but I still have to walk in egg shells around him to avoid getting him upset or disagreeing with him.

I have also known I’ve been gay for a while now. I grew up mainly around women (parents got divorced young) and I guess that could have added to a more effeminate side of me.

I am extremely attracted to/have frequent fantasies of being used by another man who is dominant and assertive. I constantly think about being face fucked, degraded, humiliated, and just being generally disrespected and spoken down to by other men. It’s got to the point where I seek it online. I want another guy to hold my head and just use my throat. I also think about serving another man non sexually. So just doing that he says/commands, doing as I’m told, and kneeling in submission.

Also I’m not even straight but I frequently think about another man forcing me into being a cuck and stuff with a woman involved.

I understand I am in a pretty bad situation and I kind of want to get rid of these desires. My passiveness/submissiveness also bleeds into my non sexual life. I’m very agreeable. I prefer to not be that way though because I want a normal relationship with someone, if I decide to go that route.

Is there any way to get rid of this? I have stopped watching porn and masturbating and do not know how long that will last, but I’m willing to try really hard.

Just need some help.